A Homemade Xmas Gift and In Memoriam

Last year about this time I talked about a Christmas gift that I was making for my family members

but of course was unable to share in fear that they might see it on my blog.

I planned to share it this month and now I do so with a heavy heart.

I will start by saying that I've received 2 phone calls this week thanking me again for the gift.

So yes, I need to share it.

Last December I called my sister and told her that I would be coming over and not to ask questions.

I said it had to with "Christmas".

When I arrived she was the only one home and I told her to "Get lost".

"What are you doing?" she asked and then added

"Don't go into Grace's room, she might be working on something that she doesn't want you to see"

I reassured her I wouldn't so she went downstairs to do laundry.

I had a little box with me and inside it was little black flatten balls of Sculpey clay that I had pierced on the top of the "circle".

I yelled "Stay down there!"  and I whispered to Hank their elderly yellow lab to come with me.

I've written about the summer trip the family took to the Lake with Hank, HERE.

So we are in the bathroom and Hank sat patiently as I slowly, softly but firmly, pressed each disc on the top of his nose.

Then I put each one carefully into a baggie and sit them in the box.

When we are done I walk to the basement door and yelled "OK! you can come up now"

My sister walked up the steps and looked at the little box in my hand. "What's in there?" she asked.

"Don't you worry about it" I told her and held up the box and said "Christmas!"

I told her good-bye and as I walked out to my car she yelled "you are weird" and I yelled back that she was too and we laughed.

Fast forward to Christmas and we are opening gifts. 

I had made little boxes out of watercolor paper and drawn ribbon and name-tags on them.

I had my family all sit together and open their boxes at the same time.

They looked at it quizzically at first.

The girls had necklaces and my sister and her husband had key-chains.

They started to comment on them and my sister asked slowly "Is it a...buck-eye?"

No one had figured it out.

"No" I said, "Feel the texture, the imprint?" and they started to run a finger across the pieces of clay.

"It's an imprint of Hank's nose!" I exclaimed.

They all burst out a collective "AAAAHHHHHH" and my sister, who doesn't cry easily, got up and ran for the bathroom

I ran after her and took a photo.

"Don't be putting me on your BLOG!" she sniffed.

and Lily ran over and hugged Hank.

Yeah, the gifts were a huge success.

So....last Wednesday I had gotten home (I work half days on Wednesday) and my sister calls to see if I'm busy.

I had lots of plans but I ask "Why?"

"Well" she says "I've just been in a car accident and this guy hit me and my car is not driveable."

Luckily she is OK, even if her car is not.

She had to wait for a tow truck and the police to finish up but she asked me to meet her at the car body/repair shop.

I rounded up the dogs and put them in the laundry room and left.

She was already there when I got there and her little VW Bug was pretty badly smashed in just behind the drivers side door.

As I drove her home, she was talking about how she she had a high deductible. (She was a a stop sign, stopped and then went and suddenly out of nowhere a car hit her. But because she had a stop sign, it was her fault)

She was irritated how whenever you get a little bit ahead, something seems to happen to take your cash.

I agreed and said how last year my tax refund went directly to cut down the tree that fell on my house and the year before it went to 4 new tires that I had to get. Then someone said to me at the time, that I was fortunate to have the money. I said that while it's irritating, you just have to think of it that way. And.....

I said, " You might not have thought of this yet but, if that car had hit you seconds earlier and in the little car, you could have died."

"Yeah", she grudgingly agreed. 

As we drove I said to her "OK, I'm going to say something to you and I'll only say it once."

"OoooooK" she replied. 

Then I told her that when the day comes that Blue is old and hurting and not living a quality life, that I might need someone to tell me that it's time to let him leave this world. I said that I would probably be mad at whoever told me this and that I might not be able to accept it but I might just need someone to say it to me anyway".

"OK" she replied.

(Now I haven't mentioned that Hank had had a stroke the week before and how my sister had called Doc in a panic at Midnight and how the next day Doc adjusted Hank and gave him a shot of something to help his brain and inflammation, then Doc had said that in a few days, time would tell.)

"So... I'm trying to say that maybe it's time to think about Hank.."

"OH NO!" she interrupted. "He's doing MUCH better."

"OK", I said. "I just wanted to say that."

I pulled up to her house and she walked up to the front door and turned and waved.

Her face formed a tight smile but I could see sadness and tell that she didn't want to cry.

I came home and let my dogs out and started a load of laundry and set down to the computer when my phone rang.

It was my sister.

I couldn't understand a word she trying to say, she was sobbing so hard.

I told her to take a breathe and talk slowly, that I couldn't understand her.

I heard her gulp and say, "I let the dogs outside and they did their business and came in and I gave them both their treats.

Then they went into the living room and laid down on their beds in front of the fireplace."

She stopped for moment and said

"I was on the phone with Lily and I glanced over at the dogs and noticed that Hank looked to be in a weird position"

Then she walked over and looked at him closer and told Lily she had to hang up but for her to come home RIGHT NOW.

She sobbed to me "He's GONE!"

What followed afterwards was so many tears and a very heartbroken family.

Later, much later they have all come to realize that at least he has home, in front of a fire sleeping next to his buddy.

And at least my sister was in the house and had just been with him and knew that he had his treat and that his last moments were peaceful.

Yeah.....

Another awful sad story that I'm sharing.

I've promised before to try not to write posts like this but...

I feel that if I didn't share this, the passing of a wonderful very loved dog that I would somehow be disrespectful of his memory.

Hank was one of those good dogs that never did a thing wrong. He was just the perfect dog.

I know that people have different beliefs but I believe he is now with my perfect dog, my Golden Retriever, my Maddie.

She passed almost 10 years ago and my heart still hurts to think about her.

I hope not to have any more stories like this for a very long time.

But I also wanted to remind everyone that sometimes a gift made from the heart,

a gift that doesn't cost very much,

can mean more than anything trendy thing you can buy.

NO more SAD stories!

photography by Lily Ng Dung

Several posts back I wrote about being bummed about heartless people.
I told you about my first little dog, Vivian and about Hattie's previous owner and.....

Anyway I just wanted to say thank you for all the kind and caring comments. I truly appreciate them.

But I also feel kinda weird about it. It's not my intent to come off sounding like some saint or do-gooder. I worry that I'm not translating my thoughts and emotions into the proper words.

I just wanted to explain my exhausted mental state. I'm sure that any other animal lover would act the same as I have. I'm really not at all that special.

Also, my OTHER concern is that if this "stuff" sucks the Joy out of me, it can not be make for fun happy upbeat blog reading.

So, I will try to keep the sad stuff to a minimum.

That being said, I have several new stories from the last week that are just as bad...

but don't worry, I won't share them.

Instead I will talk about my niece Lily.

I've talked about her often and although I do have 2 other nieces whom I adore,

Lily is the one that shares my great love of animals and who also works with me.

I have now gotten her some more work hours at the vet clinic helping out the vet technicians.

She's assisting them and the vets, wherever she is needed.

My hope is that she will eventually decide to go into the Vet Tech Program and get certification.

She is very kind and caring and so attentive to the animals needs. I think she would perfect.

On her first day in this new position, she had to help with a little poodle that came in from the Humane Society. It had been running loose and then out into the street where it was hit by a car.

(That's one of the stories I won't be sharing.) Yes, the week was just full of not so happy stuff.

Instead I will share photos that Lily took when she and her family drove to Racine, WI a few weeks ago.

photography by Lily Ng Dung

I have always thought that she has a great eye for photography.

But she just dismisses my encouragements.

I have even bought her some books for Christmas a couple of years back about dog photography when she seemed to be a bit interested and while she flipped through the pages, she never actually read them.

I told her that we should take a class together on Photography but that's hard to do since we work opposite hours most of the time.

Then I told her to just take the class and then teach me what she's learned and she just laughed.

OK, back to the the Racine pictures. So, the family goes to Racine all the time.

Her mom (my sister) and dad lived up there when they were young and had first met. (Sometimes they even talk about moving back up to the area).

Apparently Lily had told her old dog Hank, that after she graduated high school, that she would take him up to see the lake.

She realizes this could be his last summer.

photography by Lily Ng Dung

Hank is one of those wonderful dogs. The kind that has been perfect from day one.

Hank is now an old boy but he still gets around by himself although he's a bit wobbly and slow.

Lily is very close to him since they have grown up together. 

I remember how she was just a tiny kid and fell and cut her lip open and they had to rush her to the emergency room to get it stitched up and she was crying and saying something and my sister had the Doctor stop for a moment to try figure out what Lily was crying for. 

Finally the semi-coherent words came from her bloodied swollen lip.

"I need Hank. I need Hank." she was pleading.

My sister calmed her with the promise that they would soon be back home with Hank.

Hank has always been there for her. 

So when Lily announced to the family of her planned trip, they loaded up both of the cars and headed to Racine.

Lily took these photos with her Point and Shoot camera.

No editing or cropping.

She knows nothing about photography and I love these photos.

I tell her that if she had a GOOD camera and a little bit of knowledge that she could be a professional.

She just replied, "Nah, too much competition, everyone wants to be a photographer".

I will try not to push her.

It's hard for me not to do that, especially since my own father frowned on anything creative and wanted me to be a secretary.

OK, this post is probably bordering along the lines of "Sad".

photography by Lily Ng Dung

I'll try to do better next time.