Saturday, December 31, 2011


I was brought up to clean my plate. There were starving children in China who would be happy to have that food. I hadn't lived through the Depression, where you didn't know where your next meal was coming from. I didn't work hard all day to make a living to have food wasted. It didn't matter if I wasn't hungry or if I was suddenly FULL. I had to eat it all.
I distinctly remember the "Pancake" incident. Huge pancakes had been made. I eat 2 and felt like I was about to burst and then another was dropped onto my plate. I couldn't eat it. I felt sick.
I was ungrateful. It ended in a scene of tears and raised voices and someone locking themselves in their room for days. (Not me, I wasn't allowed such a luxury.)
My little sister sat there and watched it all in silence.
my sister and me
I suppose that's why her girls are allowed to snack just before a meal and pick at their dinner and walk away from half finished plates.
None of them have any weight issues.
While I have gone up and down and UP and down and up and up.
Wow, it's a wonder that I turned out normal.
Yeah, Yeah. I know. Kinda normal.
I mean they won't have to cut the door frame apart to get me out of the house but...
Maybe that's the reason that I've just spent the day eating all the crap in my cupboards and refrigerator..
I CAN'T throw it away and it's entirely too UNHEALTHY to feed to my pets.
So, I'm in a sugar coma. A lethargic zombie.
TOMORROW I will begin.
I will make a sincere effort to make it into old age. To stop fueling my body with junk that I wouldn't feed me dogs.
I'm cleaning house in between snacking. It's a mess.
Last night when I went to bed, laying there with Twinkle snuggled up next to me, I could feel my heart beating. At first I thought I was having a heart attack and then I thought - Oh God, not NOW. I don't want paramedics coming into this messy house.
And then I thought - I really have to start being healthy.
I blame this messiness on growing up where orderliness was more important than creativeness and being told not to waste paper when I wanted to draw.
I also blame it on having my possessions thrown away. On my mothers things being given away or just disappearing from the house and then living in such cold silent sterile environment.
I blame the hair on the steps and footstool on my furry kids and I blame THAT on the memory of my cat being thrown outside. Not for any reason except for being a cat. And when she wouldn't run away...watching her being DRIVEN away as I stood in the driveway sobbing.
(I can't tell you what I happened to my dog after that.
Someday, not today. Not strong enough to go there yet.
But then you would understand why I have my dogs....)
Maybe that's why I'm always drawn to the tale of Edie in Grey Gardens.
She started out normal.
But then she became a recluse, living in garbage and surrounded by cats.
Slippery slope.
I blame on the fact that when I finished high school, I wanted to go to College to major in English. I wanted to write.
I wanted to minor in Art. To learn all that I could. But I was living at home and told that I needed to forget such nonsense. I needed to learn typing and shorthand. So I went to a junior college.  I spent hours in the library when I should have been in class.  But a person doesn't have to go to College to learn things. I learned on my own, the things that were important to me.
and then I worked at a Bank. It sucked my heart and soul out of me.
I digress....
My nieces gave me some books at Christmas about Art and Art workshops and some Inktense watercolor pencils. I squealed in delight. I stated that I could happily stay in my house forever and never leave.
They said that's what I do NOW.
I'm thinking of Edie again.
Next year will be different. I won't let my past define me any longer. I will step out of my comfort zone.
Yep, no resolutions for me. Just to remember:

Thursday, December 29, 2011


No Resolutions this year.
No big list.
I'm just going to work on being happy and enjoying my life.
and if my life isn't making me happy then I need to just change it.
Maybe I should head SOUTH for
some SUN and FUN and get away from this cold weather.
I'll pack my bikini and work on my tan.

Saturday, December 24, 2011


or Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah or Joyous Kwanzaa or Good Yule Or Bah Humbug!
but definitely -

Thursday, December 22, 2011

82, now 81

I was recently given an award from Garden Girl. It's an award given to some of her favorite blogs that have less than 200 Followers and it's kinda funny. Funny because I had 82 the day before and now I have 81. I don't think this award is working for me! LOL!
I guess I don't really THINK about it too much. I mean, yeah I NOTICED that I had 82 Followers and I sometimes forget that. Usually comments to my posts are from pretty much the same group of Blogger friends. I have no idea if anyone else is still reading... and I ramble on and on and on. Every once in a while a comment from someone other than my core group of blog buddies will appear and I am SO surprised! Whoa, I forget there are other people out there, possibly reading or maybe just stumbling into my little world for a moment.
So, with this award I am supposed to list 5 fav blogs that have under 200 Followers and tell a little something about them, in an effort to help them get some more Followers.
Well, I discovered that MOST of my Fav blogs are well over 200, but that is really no big surprise. They are all FABULOUS.
OK, but now I'm getting a complex. I've been blogging since June of 2009 and I haven't even hit 100.
Am I doing something wrong?
Am I boring?
Do I jump around too much from topic to topic.
Art. Writing, Dogs, Cats, Gardening, Decorating and who knows what. Maybe I need to focus on a topic and stay there...uh, I can't do that.
My mind doesn't work that way. But when I looked up and noticed my number had dropped to 81. OMG! It was KINDA funny, that I get an award to help gain Followers and I lose one.
Who dropped me?!
OK, I don't really care.
I quickly scan my Followers list. Whew, all my friends are there.
I haven't accidentally offended someone that I care about.
I don't want to even think about this now.
I don't even care how many Followers I have, do I?
I do want people to like my writing and someday I hope to write my book(s).
So now that I DO think about it, I guess it would be WISE to get more Followers. If people know me, then maybe when I get my book(s) written and published, they will buy them!
Maybe I need to make sure I include "labels" on the bottom of my posts. I usually forget that. Maybe that links up to Google searches or something. I'm not really sure how THAT works.
Maybe I should respond to every comment in the comments box following the post. Or maybe in email. Sometimes I do, but then I feel like maybe I'm bugging people. Like -
"Jeez, I left her a comment and now she emails me!"
Personally I love when I get an email but....
Why am I suddenly worrying about this?
I feel like Sally Fields
All happy that people like her, Really like her!
I don't want to be like her! I don't care what people think!
um, thanks Garden Girl! really! LOL! Thanks.
My award
is supposed to be passed on....
OK here's the blogs that I love that have less than 200 Followers.
Christer? Maybe. He's on Wordpress and I can't find where his Followers are listed. I would think that he would have thousands but just in case he doesn't. Then I would say definitely his blog.
Everyday but Wednesdays he posts beautiful photos. Mostly from his walks by his home with his dogs (and a cat or 2 following) his blog is a MUST. My daily escape from my reality.
Denise: is so busy rescuing Schnauzers and painting murals.:
Denise: creating sculpture, paintings and awesome photos:
Of course, Garden Girl: Dog lover, Nature lover and Foodie:
Robin, who's busy knocking out Fabulous Art work and JUST started blogging.:
Suzie, she really knows how to do Halloween!:
Deanna, artist and "Chicken" Mom:
and, oh that's 7. OK. I'll stop there but that doesn't mean I don't love all the rest.
Do with it what you will. Pass it along if you wish.  Don't fret about like I did.

Thursday, December 15, 2011


I have family who asks me for my Christmas list.
I'm lucky that I have someone that asks.
So I write up a list, this year it's mostly books, I love warm socks and I want a nail gun.
Gift cards always work.
But I have a secret Christmas list. One that there's no way I would get any of these things but here it is:

                                       The Lotus Cat Tower

The Modkat litter box

The Pet Roomba

a Cat Water Fountain

Hmmm....I'm suddenly sensing a theme!

and finally the camera to take photos of everything:

Sony A900
Oh well!
Guess I'll be keeping my point & shoot a little bit longer!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011


that irritate the HELL out of me.
Like when I tell people at work - "There's a HUGE hawk outside watching the little dogs!"
and they nod their heads and dismiss me with a wave of their hand.
Then later they come up to me and say -
"There's a HUGE hawk outside, you better watch the little dogs!"
I want to say - "DUH! Do ya think?"
Instead I just nod and give them a wave.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

It looks nicer at night. In the day it's a silver tree in a wire "dog" plant stand. But I like it.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

"High" is never HIGH enough.

Last night I was worried about Blue. When I came home I found he had pulled the comforter off my bed. He never does anything bad while I'm gone, just sleeps on the bed. I HAD given him a knuckle-bone as a treat before I left in the morning and I don't usually do that. As soon as I let him out of the room he ran for the water bowl and drank and drank. I finally stopped him and put him outside. I had visions of "bloat". When I brought him back inside, I noticed that he looked "pink" like his allergies had kicked in again and he wanted to drink more, it was like he couldn't get enough. Phone #'s started spinning in my head. Who to call first? and then he wouldn't EAT! He just went to the sofa and curled up and slept.
I watched him for a while and then went back upstairs to tidy up my room. Under the comforter was a HALF-eaten bag of cat food. I had forgotten that I had placed that bag high up on my desk in my room where the cats couldn't get it. He's fine now. Another lesson learned. High is never high enough.

Thursday, December 8, 2011


OK, not really. I'm broke. Paycheck to paycheck kinda thing like most people.
Robbing Peter to pay Paul.
Getting a paycheck every other week and depositing it on my lunch hour at the credit union and then coming home after work to pay bills on-line until it's gone.
I like paying on-line. Much less painful then the old days of writing out check after check and then addressing an envelope and getting a stamp and mailing it. Oh wow, I'm glad THOSE days are over!
So, I got paid on Monday and as I drove home, I have to drive past a section of town lined with little antique and collectibles shops. They are closed by the time I come home at night but sitting at the stoplight I could feel my eyes being pulled towards the sidewalk to some "chairs" bike-chained to the front of one of shops.
I went home and paid "some" of the bills.
The next morning, through frost covered windows I squinted out at them. Blue leaned forward for a look but didn't have any appreciation for them.

At work I told some of the "girls" about them. I was starting to describe them,
"They're Mid-Century Modern..." and was met with laughter.- "What is THAT?!"
OK, I know not everyone is into the "stuff" that I like but what's with the laughter.
Why am I EVEN explaining?
Why am I TRYING to talk to them?

I had Wednesday off. I drove to the shop and she made a deal. All 4 chairs and a table for a $100.
But I don't need a table. I have a table. and THIS table was NOT a Tulip table.
If it was, well I would have needed THAT.
But I only need 2 chairs. I already have 2 high-back iron chairs and I don't like too matchy-matchy.
My style is Mid-Century Modern/Old Weird stuff Eclectic.
Now the old me would have wanted it all and would plan on fixing up the other 2 chairs and reselling them.
But the new me, the WIP me, knows that the basement is full of that kind of junk so...
I'm proud to say, I just got TWO.
But since I'm paycheck to paycheck, I won't be paying one of the Paul's.
That Paul being the Phone/Internet Paul.
So if I disappear for a while, you know why.
So I will end the suspense, here's the chairs....they need some work. They each have a crack at the front of the seat and there's rust on the pedestal part. But they are the REAL DEAL and not some Target knock-off. I don't think it should be that hard to repair them back to being bright white and shiny!
(Don't look at my house, I hate the floor. Just look at the chair.)
Oh, and here's Rosie.
I didn't talk about this before but after the horrible "pole falling on her" accident, I took her in for a dental. She had some very bad teeth and her gums were looking horrible.
I didn't want to do it because my dear friend Nita lost her little dog the day after he had a dental and then my sister's cat died right after his dental! So I was fit to be tied. I REALLY didn't want to do it. The head tech told me that she had a little Pomeranian once with teeth as bad as Rosie's and she told the vet that she would rather lose her than have her continue on with her mouth being so bad. I told her that I would rather have Rosie have a bad mouth and be ALIVE than have her DEAD.
I said she had been through SO much and it was such a miracle that she recovered, that I didn't want to lose her now. So, they did the dental and I stood at their elbow. I questioned everything they did. I watched the monitor, I read the numbers out loud to them. I drove them crazy. After the procedure, as she woke up she started gagging up blood and phlegm. They said that was usual. Then she coughed up more.
And more.
I stood and watched her as the tech put her in her kennel. Then she started to twist. I loudly exclaimed, "What's wrong! What's wrong?!"
So they pulled her out of the kennel and she was having seizures. Doc commented on how she was making figure eights with her body. Finally they stopped. They said it most likely was because of the brain trauma she had experienced from the pole accident.
Finally she was completely awake. I took her back into my work area with me. She gagged up more but finally stopped that too. I took her home and gave her meds for several days and now....
She's not 100%.
I think she's 110%! She's sassier than she's ever been. I guess they were right. Her mouth must have been really hurting her and making her feel "not so great".
Now she's running around the house, attacking her little stuffed animals.
She sits on the floor heat vents and does her "Marilyn Monroe" thing.
She gallops around the yard and dances in circles on the bed.
And poses in my new chair.
Yep, I got me some cool chairs and I got a healthy Rosie, so

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

OK, I'm sorry BUT.....

you just HAVE to watch this one!
It's the funniest one yet!
Anyone with a cat will be nodding their head and laughing out loud!
I mean, can you not LOVE cats?

Sunday, December 4, 2011


Griffin, the old man of my house. Woken from his sleep.
"What? What the HELL?!  No I don't need to go outside! Leave me alone."
He's grumpy sometimes.

Friday, December 2, 2011


So... I take some time off from the blogging world to get my head on straight.
I'm happy to report that it's no longer so tilted but it's still a work in progress.
In the meantime, so many posts have been written.
This evening I started trying to catch up and OMG!
The stuff that I almost missed.
Please RUN don't WALK over to Denise's blog -
and while I know she's a talented artist, I'm thinking the girl has found a whole new gig.
Check out her photographs!
Here are just 3! FABULOUS!

Friday, November 25, 2011


Youtube videos! It reminds me SO much of my gang.
I think I need to take a little break from the computer. I have had a few things happen over the last few days that made me stop and think about STUFF. Nothing terribly serious, just me spinning out of control and not getting anything accomplished. Instead of me taking a deep breath and getting my head on straight, I've been "escaping" to the Internet, reading blogs. surfing around reading. pinning stuff, just being mindless and in denial of things that need to be taken care of and figured out.
Denial and Procrastination.
2 of my not so fine personality traits. So I am taking a might be 12 hours or 12 days, but I'll be back.
In the meantime, I think you might enjoy this video.
Most of you probably have already this but in case you haven't (Christer) here it is:

Thursday, November 24, 2011

I WON"T BE AT.....

Target, Kohls, Walmart, Best Buy on Black Friday.
First on all, I'm working....
but mostly because they don't have what I want.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011


I'm going through old photos and just found one of Truman and my niece when she was little. This photo must have been taken about 13 years ago. At the time my sister and her family had been visiting the local shelters looking for a puppy to add to their family. They went to both the no-kill and kill shelters and hadn't found the right dog. Eventually a litter of puppies were brought into a shelter and they adopted a little yellow lab puppy who grew into a wonderful dog.  But during one of the shelter "visits" my sister saw this huge old black dog and she ended up mentioning him in a phone conversation to me. She said he was this big old sad lug but he was just not what the family was looking for. Her words haunted me and I ended up taking a drive down to the city shelter. The animal control officer said he was at least 7 and he had been there for the required amount of time and now his time was up. He would be put down on the weekend, just a couple of days away. I looked at him and he looked back at me through the chain link kennel door. He pressed the side of his face against it and I poked my fingers between the wire and stroked his temple. I asked what the huge golf-ball size lump was on his lip and the officer said she had a vet that would take it off for 20 bucks if I took him.
So the removal was set for the next day and I said I would be there after work to pick him up. When I arrived he was still out cold and they wheeled him out to my car on one of those things that mechanics use to lay on to slide under cars. I had a 4 door sedan at the time and it took three of us to push and pull his body into the back seat. I drove to my sisters with him passed out. When I got to their house they said to come in and have dinner and afterwards he should be awake. We finished the meal and walked to the car. He was still unconscious, but I thought I smelled "poop". He was just starting to let some "go" so my sister and her husband and I hurried and pulled him out. He was so wobbly he couldn't stand up on his own. We got a sheet under him and formed a kind of sling and started to walk him around the yard. He staggered slowly like he was drunk. After a while, he got his footing and stood by himself. We sat on the deck steps and looked at him. A big black old dog stumbling around the yard. They asked me if I was regretting my decision. I shook my head  "No".
 He and I drove home a little later and he walked in the house and instantly became part of the family. Never a problem. Never a moment of trouble. He would let my cat sleep on him and he was submissive to my other dogs.
I adopted Truman when he was 7 yrs old, he weighed a 155lbs and was a Newfie/Lab mix.
He was the most gentlest dog and shared his life with us for 5 more years....just a reminder to everyone that it's not just the puppies that need homes.
Who says you can't buy LOVE?
It was the best 20 bucks I've ever spent.